Top Reasons for Divorce
Divorce which is different from marriage annulment is the legal ending or termination of a marital union. There are numerous cases of divorce in the world today especially in the Western world. There is the tendency for some people to limit the reasons for divorce to only sexual infidelity. Though it may be one of the leading reasons for divorce, there are other factors that may lead to termination of a marriage such as money, entering into marriage with wrong intention, lack of compatibility, lack of sexual satisfaction and a whole number of other reasons.
Enough researches have been conducted on the factors that may lead to termination of marriage and a number of reasons for divorce have been discovered based on records. Surprisingly, the results of some of these studies show that communication problem is one of the major reasons for divorce.
Factors leading to divorce.
Marrying for wrong purposes
People enter into marriage for a number of reasons but not out of true love. There are some people that enter into marriage with their partner because of money or because they think that their partners will be capable of providing all their needs. Love is the least thing they consider. Such people normally get disappointed when their expectations are not met by their partners. It is always better to marry for love. So, think very well before you make your choice. The choice is yours to make but ensure that you go in for marriage with the right intention if you really don’t want to have a broken or failed marriage.
Too much dependent on your partner
Lack of individual identity is one of the major reasons for divorce. You are expected to live peacefully with your partner, but this does not mean that you should not have your individual identity. There are some spouses who are not able to express themselves or have their own interest. They cannot do things without their partners. They follow the desire and choices of their partners. If you are such a person, you are much more likely going to experience marriage rut easily and you will feel like ending the whole marriage. Marriage boredom arising from lack of individuality can lead to termination of marital union. So, if you are into marriage, it is important that you distinguish your individuality from the individuality of your partner.
Tendency to go single
One of the major reasons for divorce is the tendency to go single. Just as some couple become too dependent on their partner, there are some couples that go to the extreme of the other side which is going single and forgetting that they are couples. This normally happens when children have grown up and require less attention. During this time, some people forget that they are couples and they tend to do things alone and live more of independent live. Becoming too independent from one’s partner is one of the main reasons for divorce as studies have shown. If you don’t have anything in common with your partner, divorce is more likely going to set in.
Having different philosophies of live
Many marriages have failed today because the couples have different philosophies of live or do not share the same vision of success. Before you enter into marriage, you should ensure that you are pursuing the same goal with your husband or wife or that two of you have the same vision or philosophy of life. If you are a man who believes it is the wife’s duty to do cooking and house chores, there is no need marrying a woman that does not share the same vision or believe in this philosophy of life. If you do, your marriage is much more likely going to fail. The bottom line is to marry a person that share the same philosophy with you.
Lack of intimacy and sexual satisfaction
Lack of intimacy and sexual satisfaction by any of the partners of a couple is one of the major reasons for divorce. If a man is not able to satisfy his wife on bed or a woman is not good on bed, there is the tendency for the marriage to fail. There are some people that cannot cope and tolerate their partner’s sexual week points. But it is not everybody that can do that. People that cannot do that and will not like to engage in extramarital affair normally file for divorce.
Lack of caring
Some people erroneously think that only women require tender and loving care from their partners. This is far from the truth. Men also require care and love from their women. Lack of care and love from any of the partner may lead to divorce. Some couples do complain seriously because their partners are not caring. Some who cannot cope with it file for divorce.
Lack of happiness arising from unmet expectations
We normally become annoyed and unhappy when our expectations are not met. Spouses normally expect some change from their partners when they complain, blame or criticise them for some behaviours they don’t like. However, when this change does not come, they will remain unhappy. They have no option than to work out their happiness by themselves. Couples who cannot cope or remain unhappy for live normally file for divorce when it becomes obvious that their partners cannot make the change they want. So, unmet expectation therefore is one of the reasons for divorce today.
Money and other financial issues
Money or other financial issues are among the major reasons for divorce. Contrary to the thinking of many people, lack of money is not always the reasons for divorce but lack of agreement in the financial area. Two people who have different views about financial management or how money should be spent in the family may not be able to live together as husband and wife. If they do, one has to make some sacrifices for the marriage to existence otherwise it will not last. They will be having misunderstanding regularly on financial issues. If you are a spender and you marry a saver or a miser, you will always be having problems with him or her. You may not see any problem in buying a second pair of wrist watch or diamond jewellery. But for your partner, it is a waste of money. He or she will blame you for wasting the family money.
Lack of availability and physical contact
There is nothing that kills marriage than lack of availability and physical contact. Physical contact here is much more than sex. This does not mean that sex is not good. However, you need to go extra mile with little practices like goodbye kisses, hello, hand holding, impromptu hug and similar things. Such physical contacts and gestures deepen love even though they are non sexual.
Lack of availability is one of the reasons for divorce. If you are always away from home, you are preparing the ground for divorce. There is nothing annoying than not seeing your partner when you need him or her. At times, couples may want somebody to talk or stay with. So, it is always important to be available to your partner in order to avoid marriage breakups.
Not exploring interesting together
Not exploring interest together may lead to divorce. There are some people that will not discuss their ideas and interest with their partners. Their partners only discover about their interest or what they are doing when they have almost completed it. If your partner always discover what you are doing rather than you discussing and planning it with him or her, your marriage is much more likely going to end up in divorce.
Keeping secrets from your partner
This is similar to the point just mentioned above. Most people keep secret from their partners. When their partners discover, they become annoy. Mistrust will set in. Some people react to such behaviour by filing for divorce. If you really cherish your relationship, you should always be open to your partner and not keep secret from him or her.
Inability to peacefully settle disagreement
Inability to settle disagreement is one of the main reasons for divorce. We are unique in many ways. So, you will definitely have disagreements with your partner. But what makes the difference is the manner the disagreement is handled. Some couples are always able to peacefully resolve their agreements while some never resolve their agreement. When disagreements are not resolved, there is the tendency for the marriage to break because peace cannot reign where there are rancour and quarrels which are bred by disagreement.
Domestic violence occurs in many ways such as physical abuse, denial of basic needs of life, denial of money, dominance and others. It is one of the major reasons for divorce. Domestic violence is a strong issue. Nobody will like to be abused. Immediate action is taken to stop it. The court takes it seriously and terminates marriage based on that reason.
Addiction and other unbecoming behaviours
Persistence history of addiction and other unbecoming behaviour from any one of the partner of a couple can force the other to file for divorce. Many marriages have ended today because of addiction and bad behaviour from one of the partners in marriage. Some of the addictions and unbecoming behaviours which can lead to divorce are drug and alcohol abuse, too much gambling, theft, dirtiness and others.
Cheating one’s partner is one of the major reasons for divorce. In fact, divorce is traditionally accepted based on infidelity. Some religions also accept divorce on the count of infidelity or cheating one’s partner.
Other reasons for divorce include:
- mental disorder
- prolonged and lethal health conditions
- mistreatment of children
- excessive control on the partner